Whenever one year ends and a new one begins we tend to reflect on what that old year brought us, what it taught us, what the coming year will bring us and what we will do differently.
As 2022 draws to a close and 2023 fast approaches I feel these thoughts are magnified 100 fold this year.
Since we have most surely changed.
As Homo sapiens we rebel against change even when that change maybe for our benefit.
I’m not going to go into a long missive here to go into why it’s OK to feel not OK, and that breaking down is in fact a sloughing off and thereby a rebuilding up, but thought that John Roedel’s profound poem “Hey God” was perfect for what I want to say and what a lot of us are thinking, feeling and going through.
I’d love to know what you think and if you agree.
Me: Hey God.
Me: I'm falling apart. Can you put me back together?
God: I would rather not.
God: Because you aren't a puzzle.
Me: What about all of the pieces of my life that are falling down onto the ground?
God: Let them stay there for a while. They fell off for a reason. Take some time and decide if you need any of those pieces back.
Me: You don't understand! I'm breaking down!
God: No - you don't understand. You are breaking through. What you are feeling are just growing pains. You are shedding the things and the people in your life that are holding you back. You aren't falling apart. You are falling into place. Relax. Take some deep breaths and allow those things you don't need anymore to fall off of you. Quit holding onto the pieces that don't fit you anymore. Let them fall off. Let them go.
Me: Once I start doing that, what will be left of me?
God: Only the very best pieces of you.
Me: I'm scared of changing.
God: I keep telling you - YOU AREN'T CHANGING!! YOU ARE BECOMING!
Me: Becoming who?
God: Becoming who I created you to be! A person of light and love and charity and hope and courage and joy and mercy and grace and compassion. I made you for more than the shallow pieces you have decided to adorn yourself with that you cling to with such greed and fear. Let those things fall off of you. I love you! Don't change! ... Become! Become! Become who I made you to be. I'm going to keep telling you this until you remember it.
Me: There goes another piece.
God: Yep. Let it be.
Me: So ... I'm not broken?
God: Of course Not! - but you are breaking like the dawn. It's a new day. Become !!!